An optimist's nightmare!!

This is a place where i thought my calling was.. A place where i thought i can transform myself, a place of jargons but unfortunately till date i do not know what has happened to me or is still happening to me.. There have been more days of loathing how i am wasting my time than days of thinking that i have discovered my path..

I am not expert at palmistry but from the pattern on my palm, i knew i was different. Not that i am a believer of destiny but this is one thing which i thought was definitely different. I had never found what my talent was. For 23 long years, i have been trying to look within and find for what purpose i was made for. So when this place happened i thought the days of holistic transformations are here.

Problems are more while the ability and the resolve to find solutions for the same are escaping me and everyone alike. Bogged down by pressures, not just peer pressure or pressure to perform but something more, i am still not able to get up.

Maybe i should have waited, maybe i made the wrong choice, maybe i wasnt made for this.. Maybe my thought process is still screwing me up.. Behold the guy who says that he sees the glass half full, even he would be brought down on his knees under the pessimist's dreamland here. Everything that happens, happens for a reason.. But here we are still floundering for those reasons and going by the likes of it, we still will be..